Bush Caught on Microphone Wishing for Iraq War to Continue Indefinitely
A victim of open mic syndrome yet again, President Bush was overheard today wishing for the conflict in Iraq to continue indefinitely.
Bush was taking a break after a speech to Lockheed Martin employees when he stepped outside and up to a decorative fountain. Flicking a coin into the water the president was caught on tape quietly whispering, "I wish the war in Iraq never ends." The words were carried live on CNN, but Fox News played an enhanced version of the audio in which a voice like the president's can be heard adding the word "badly" to the wish -- "I wish the war in Iraq never ends badly."
It was not the first time the president had been caught off guard by a wireless lapel microphone. Late last year Bush was overheard singing "Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh, what a relief it is" while in a restroom stall in the United Nations building.
Later, when questioned about the Iraq comment, Bush said that at the time he spoke it he was imitating the "gutless Democrats in Congress."
Today's visit to Lockheed Martin was Bush's second to the defense contractor this year and his tenth visit to Lockheed overall. His visits are looked forward to by Lockheed employees, who say they owe the president a debt of gratitude for his policies.
Bush said he still hoped to pay at least one visit to Walter Reed Army Hospital some time before the end of his term, but it was unclear if such an opportunity would present itself.
In other news, the Pentagon is field testing a new neutron weapon in Iraq that leaves structures undamaged but incapacitates all unarmed civilians within a 100-foot radius.
TAGS: George Bush, Bushisms, Satire, Funny, Humor, Parody, News, The Onion, Iraq, Iraq War
- March 29, 2007
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